I mentioned several weeks ago that I was (still am!) making my way through The Mindful Way Through Depression.  Shannon asked what I thought about it, particularly with regard to its soundness for Christians.

I’m not terribly sure about all of the specific exercises (especially knowing there are some on an accompanying CD, and I have not listened to that), but so far the general concepts are actually very biblical if you read them with that context.  (Disclaimer here: I am not finished with the book, so I’m not vouching for the whole thing at this point.)

For instance, the general idea of mindfulness.  The author of this particular book describes mindfulness as remaining in a “being state” rather than a “doing state.”  The idea behind this is that there is a frame of mind in which we are constantly planning, problem-solving, etc. – that’s the “doing state.” There is nothing inherently wrong with this; in fact, if we aren’t in a “doing” frame of mind at some point, we probably won’t get anything done!  But when there is no problem to solve and no immediate planning to do, if we allow our brains to run off into this mode, they can drive us kind of crazy.  We jump to conclusions about people’s motives for saying or do what they’ve said or done, we add problems to problems (mentally), and we just generally get mentally caught up in trying to “do” a zillion things, rather than just focusing on and enjoying whatever it is we are currently in the middle of.  (And that may be technically doing something, by the way.  But to do it in “being mode” is to focus on just completing the task at hand, rather than mentally zooming ahead.)  What immediately came to my mind as I was reading about this concept was:

“Be still and know that I am God.”

Isn’t all of that explanation (of which there is much more in the book itself) of the “being state” really just a good description of what it means to “be still”?  Unfortunately, the author misses the “know that I am God” part, but, as believers, we can certainly fill in that blank ourselves.  Personally, I found all of the description here very helpful.  I tend to think of “being still” as having to sit in one spot and not speak, or something, but I don’t think that’s what the Lord was getting at with this instruction.  It’s more of a, “be calm; be at peace.” I have a hard time, just from the verse, really getting my head around what that looks like in real life, but all the talk of “being mode” made sense to me.  Isn’t God really saying, “Stop worrying.  Stop running around like a chicken with its head cut off – even just in your mind – and trust Me.  Trust that it will all be okay.  Enjoy the life I’ve given you.  Enjoy the task I’ve given you to do right now. Be still…and know I that I am God”?

So hear the description of “being mode,” but consider not thinking of it as “being mode”;  think of it as “being still,” and remember this verse.

“Be still and know that I am God.”

That’s what I intend to aim for.

Filed under: Spiritual Journal by Rachel
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I am not really much of a fashionista.  I like to look sufficiently pulled together to not be an embarrassment to my husband, but I am not a clothes hound.  So a whole post about clothes might be somewhat surprising.  But getting dressed has been a huge point of contention lately, as I have outgrown my regular clothes and don’t fit into any of my maternity clothes.  And nobody seems to sell truly extra-small maternity clothes for under $100.  (I bought XS maternity pants from both Old Navy and Target a couple weeks ago, and they’re both huge.  Makes no sense to me, since the XS non-maternity stuff from Target is sized correctly.)  But I went out shopping the other night, and found some stuff that will work.  Since I had such a hard time finding things, I thought I would share some of what I bought, in case it helps any other tiny expectant mamas.

I think I spent about $200-250 on clothes that night, and I came home with:

-2 pairs of pants
-2 pairs of capris or capri-like things
-2 skirts
-2 dresses
-1 sundress (that will not work without something over it, but should with)
-3-4 camis (because most of the dresses/tops/etc. will require them)
-1 sleeveless top
-1 extra black v-neck maternity t-shirt
-1 very nice summer-to-fall top
-1 cardigan

The maternity tee is, as far as I can recall, the only officially “maternity” item I bought!  That’s why I thought I might share some of the specifics of what I bought, and why they should work.  Hopefully it will help someone else think “outside the box.”  (By the way, the Miley Cyrus line at Wal-Mart also had some other really cute tops that would have worked nicely, but they didn’t fit an immediate need for me, so I didn’t want to buy them full-price.  If you have a shortage of maternity tops, you might want to check them out.)  These are not all my preferred cotton, but they all work well.

One of my favorite finds was this pair of black dress pants.  It was $15 at Wal-Mart.  The stretchy jersey makes the pants very comfortable, and the waistband is absolutely perfect for use as maternity pants.  (It looks just like some of the maternity styles.)  One caveat:  these are really snug through the hips and thighs, so you might want to go up a size from normal.  I can fit in the extra-smalls, but they’re a bit snug in that area to be decent without a really long shirt, and other reviewers have said the same.

The next best item is this skirt.  It has a very wide, gathered, very stretchy waistband, because it is designed so you can wear it as a skirt or you can pull it up higher and wear it as a tube dress.   I am pretty sure this will accommodate my growing waistline all the way through the ninth month of pregnancy.  This particular item was $20 at TJ Maxx.  Unfortunately, that means it is probably a discontinued item.  This general concept, however, is not especially unique, and similar skirts should be available elsewhere.

I did not find any workable shorts.  The only styles that looked like they would accommodate my growing belly were super-short.  I did, however, find a couple pairs of almost-shorts.  I got some stretchy No Boundaries capris at Wal-Mart.  (I had to buy a large to avoid skin-tightness, but they’re comfy and work great.)  I also bought a pair of these knickers from Target.

This tank, also from Target, will probably not last me a full nine months, but that’s okay.  The pintucks at the neckline allow the belly area to be a bit bigger than the upper portion, so it should accommodate a belly for a while – long enough to get through the hottest part of the year.  Another gorgeous shirt from Target should easily last through the summer and autumn.  (It seems to be unavailable on their website, but it’s sort of a tunic, gathered to a yoke, with ties in the back.  It’s trimmed with heavy cotton embroidered lace.)

When the weather turns cool, this cardigan will work even with a round belly.

I can’t seem to find online either of the dresses I got from Target.  The first not only has an empire waist, it’s a bit rounded, so it should fit beautifully over a round belly.  Unfortunately, the neckline is rather plunging, so it will require a camisole underneath.  (I found several at Wal-Mart, for $6 or less, from Miley Cyrus, Norma Kamali, and OP.)  This particular dress has kimono sleeves but is not the maxi dress currently on their site.  The second is sort of a shirtdress (but no buttons) made of jersey.  It will probably not last through to nine months, but will work for a while, for those who don’t mind something that hugs the belly a bit.

I also got a skirt with a very wide elastic waist.  (Not elasticized, just wide elastic.)  And the final item I bought will require the most work.  I found a pair of Phat boot-cut jeans, clearanced at Wal-Mart for $10.  I will cut the waistband area off and replace it with a wide elastic band.  (I haven’t wanted to do that up to this point because I didn’t want to spend $30+ on a pair of jeans to cut up.  But for $10, I’ll risk the possibility of messing it up.)

A few tips I learned from my purchases are to keep an eye out for:

• very wide elastic waists.  (Not elasticized, with non-stretchy fabric attached, but just plain elastic.)
• very wide waistbands made of very stretchy fabric.
• low-slung waistbands, especially those that are very stretchy or have drawstrings.  (With these low-slung waists, you have to check to make sure they will not fall down once you start walking around.)
• empire waists
• other top/dress styles that are somehow gathered through the bust area so that they are fuller below the bust
• dress styles that are stretchy enough to allow some leeway through the belly area (best for transition clothing, rather than full-nine-months clothing)
• bottoms that fit well everywhere except the belly and are inexpensive enough to risk cutting into them to add a belly panel or a wide elastic belly band
• jacket/sweater styles that are designed to not fasten in the front, or with a single button just below the bust (or thereabouts)

Filed under: Family and Femininity by Rachel
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Reduce, reuse, recycle – it’s the “environmental stewardship” trio. Reuse of various items is not only environmentally-friendly; it’s pocketbook friendly.  Unfortunately, most of us have a hard time knowing WHAT can be reused, and for what. The following ideas work for me, and hopefully will get your creative juices flowing.  Feel free to leave your own ideas in the comments!

• Tissue boxes: hold plastic grocery bags
• Parmesan cheese containers: make terrific shakers for baking soda, borax, etc.
• Syrup bottles: make dispensers for squirt-type cleaners, paint, etc.
• Plastic 3-lb. shortening cans: are the perfect size for holding hamburger patties in the freezer.
• Cotton fabric scraps: can be used for stuffing.
• Empty juice bottles: will hold water to keep around the house for watering plants, or to stock in a less-than-full freezer to help it work efficiently.
• Boxes of various sizes: can, of course, be used for storage. (Don’t overlook very small boxes. I have an offering-envelope box that serves me well by holding postage stamps.)
• Egg cartons: are useful as sorting trays, either for little children’s play, or as a means of organizing jewelry and other small items.
• Pringles cans: hold juice-can lids (the metal kind off of frozen juice concentrate) very neatly. The lids can be decorated to make matching games and stored inside the potato-chip cans.
• Bouillon jars: are a great size for storing homemade seasoning mixes (like taco seasoning).
• Film canisters: hold small craft supplies (beads, sequins, etc.) or coins.
• Spice jars: are good for beads, as well. If the beads are small enough and the holes (in the jar) are large enough, the beads can even be shaken out a few at a time.
• 5-quart ice cream buckets: are good for storing small amounts of whole grains. I store homemade powdered laundry detergent in one, as well.

Filed under: Frugality & Economics by Rachel
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Total Pillow
$19.99 + S&H

The Total Pillow is unlike any other pillow you (or I) have ever seen.  Looking something like a cross between a doughnut and a flower, it is designed to be able to twist and bend into various shapes for different purposes.  Use it as lumbar support.  Lie on it (on your belly) on the floor.  Fold it in half and curve it around for a neck pillow.  Put it between your knees when sleeping on your side.  And, yes, you can lay your head on it, too.   It really is a brilliant idea.

Unfortunately, I have some difficulties with the execution.  There are a number of pictures on the package of ways this pillow can be configured, but I can’t figure out how to do most of them.  (Instructions would be a big help!)  Two other concerns are that the pillow is not washable and does not have a cover (minor detail) and that the filler is apparently extremely dangerous, so if the pillow should burst or tear it’s a serious problem (not-so-minor detail).

All in all, though, the Total Pillow has some definite merit.  I have used it as a neck support and, while it takes some getting used to for someone as small as I am, it is not too bulky to work well for this, even with my petite frame.  And it works great for supporting the lower back.  I occasionally find myself sleeping sitting upright in the corner of our couch to combat heartburn, etc.  This is generally not very easy on my back, but I found that the Total Pillow filled in the gap here beautifully.  Last time I sat and slept on the couch, I had no backache, because of the additional support provided by the Total Pillow.

Bottom line: I think the implementation could be improved by finding a safer filler and providing a (removable, washable) cover and instructions.  But the design is a good one, and it serves its purpose well.

This is a Mama Buzz review. The product was provided by Total Pillow for this review.

Filed under: Product Reviews by Rachel
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The Rehberg v. Paulk court decision is a few months old now, but I think it’s an important one for people to be aware of.  I claim no support for the defendant on the overall merits of the case, but I have serious concerns about the ramifications of several elements of the decision.  Specifically, these:

Here, Rehberg lacks a reasonable expectation of privacy in the phone and fax numbers he dialed. Once he voluntarily provided that information to BellSouth and Alltel (later Sprint), Rehberg lacked any further valid expectation that those third parties would not turn the information over to law enforcement officers. Absent a valid right of privacy, Rehberg cannot state a constitutional violation regarding the subpoenas for his phone and fax information.

Rehberg’s voluntary delivery of emails to third parties constituted a voluntary relinquishment of the right to privacy in that information. Rehberg does not allege Hodges and Paulk illegally searched his home computer for emails, but alleges Hodges and Paulk subpoenaed the emails directly from the third-party Internet service provider to which Rehberg transmitted the messages. Lacking a valid expectation of privacy in that email information, Rehberg fails to state a Fourth Amendment violation for the subpoenas for his Internet records.

What they are claiming is that we, as citizens, do not have a “reasonable expectation of privacy” when doing business with our service providers.  Or, in other words, we cannot, or should not, expect that when we make telephone calls or send emails – which the vast majority of us have no means of doing without accessing some sort of service provider – that who we call, who we email, or the content of those emails will remain between us, the people we contacted, and the companies providing the service.

Now, please note that the issue here is not whether law enforcement agents could, in some manner, access the information.  The issue is that they did not require a warrant. To my mind, this is a clear and obvious breach of Constitutional rights, because they would never have obtained the information directly from the defendant without a warrant.  But because of this fictional absence of “reasonable expectation of privacy,” they claim that there was no violation of Constitutional rights in obtaining this information without a warrant.

Well, I look at it this way: Would they let me access this guy’s telephone records or emails?  Of course not!  Why?  Because that’s his private information. Hmmm…sounds like a “reasonable expectation of privacy” to me.  If the information is such that we would not expect that “Joe Schmoe” off the street should be able to access it, then common sense would dictate that the average citizen has a “reasonable expectation of [the] privacy” of that information.

So what can we do?  Spread the word.  Let the government know that we know about this decision, and that we think their idea of a “reasonable expectation of privacy” in this matter is completely bogus and self-serving.  Let the telephone and internet companies know that we absolutely expect that our information will remain private (unless an appropriate warrant is issued which, hopefully, would not be an issue for any of my readers!).  In short, communicate that the court is out of touch with the will of the people and with the clear sense of the Constitution’s wording.  Anything but roll over and play dead!  We have to stay vigilant!

(The quotes above were obtained from http://www.leagle.com/unsecure/page.htm?shortname=infco20100311081.  The case is Rehberg v. Paulk, and the decision was handed down by the United States Court of Appeals, Eleventh Circuit, on March 11, 2010.)

Filed under: Politics/Current Events by Rachel
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